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Thursday, February 12, 2009

Self Destructive & Self Disclosure

Self Destructive

Self destructing is basically an individual underestimating themselves. They make themselves fell unworthiness. Hence, when a person is self destructing, he/she will give negative thoughts to their oneself.

For eg:

1) Lack of Self confidence

Like some students, before entering to a public speaking class they will
be thinking that they are not good at speaking, they are going to give a
bad presentation and more negative thoughts. Therefore, before doing
the presentation they have already set in their mind that their
presentation today is going to be bad.



2) Trying to impress others.

In certain companies we can always find a staff who is ever ready to do all the stuffs in the office. They would be the outstanding one and 'so called' the most hardworking staff. Actually this is all done by the staffs to impress their employer so that they can get a promotion. When they agree to do all the job in the office, the staff will end up being tensed for having to much of work to be done. They will then pay more attention on finishing the work rather than the quality of the work. So, all their performance would be average only. The quality of their work will not be impressive. On the other hand, the other staffs who took less work would give a better quality work. Hence, the employer would be impressed with the staff that did an excellent job. In brief, the staff who tried to impress the employer was actually destructing their image and the quality of their work.

Self Disclosure

  • Sharing information about yourself to others.

-->values, beliefs and desires

-->behaviour

-->self-qualities or character

  • Way of gaining information about another person


  • Let people know things that they don't know about you.


  • Learn about how another person thinks and feels


  • Self-disclosure involves risk and vulnerability on the part of the person sharing the information


Advantages

-->Self-Knowledge:-

  • Gain a deeper understanding on your own behaviour.
  • Learn to accept yourself from other people's view.
  • You respond by developin a more positive self -concept

Communication and Relationship Effectiveness

  • Understands other people's message to the extend you understand them
  • When a person disclose their self another another person will automatically disclose too.
  • Disclosure deepens trust in the relationships and helps both people understand each other better

Psychological Health

  • People who disclose are less vulnerable to sickness

  • Feel better about yourself and your relationship when your partner accepts what you tell them.
  • For eg: raped victim who dont share their problem to others will suffer from sexual trauma, illness ( headache & stomach problems)

Disadvantages

Personal Risks:

  • Risk is that the person will not respond favorably to the information you disclose
  • It does not always lead to favorable impressions
  • Maybe rejected by even the closest friend and family members.
  • For eg: A guy who disclose that he has cheated on his partner, may find his partner no longer wanting to be quite close as before.

Relational Risk

  • Can cause problem even in close, lng term relationships
  • May threaten a relationship causing decrease in mutual attraction.
  • Self-disclosure concerning romantic fantasies, crimes or lies could easily cause negative effect.
  • One person will gain power in the relationship because of too much of disclosure
  • Self-disclosure that comes too early in a relationship can damage the relationship.

Professional risks

  • Revealing political views or attitudes towards different religious can create problem.
  • Gay and lesbian personnel in military, as well in education, law enforcement, etc..... ( they are isolated)


A useful way of viewing self-disclosure is the Johari window.

The Johari window has 4 panes:
Open Pane:- known to self and others
Blind Pane:- blind to self, seen by others
Hidden Pane :-open to self, hidden from others
Unknown Pane:- unknown to self and others

So guys check out a short quiz that we've here...

Lets see how much you understand The Johari Window....


GOOD LUCK!!!!!! :) (^-6)


http://www.abacon.com/commstudies/interpersonal/indisclosurequiz.html


Prepared by:

Jayshrisharrlini

Dimensions of Self

Self-Esteem
Personal perception of self worth.
Can be relate with self confidence.

Self-Image
Self image is not self esteem.
The mantal image of self or the self in the mirror we are looking at daily. Our outer appearance.

Self-Awareness
Personal aware or more sensitive of their surrounding and actions. Through more understanding of oneself or others can help in self-awareness.

Self-Consciousness
Is not self-awareness. It is an acute sense of self awareness. For example having a feeling of everyone is looking although nobody is looking. Sometimes due to shyness or paranoia. This is a negative effect of self-awareness. It can effect the self-esteem.

Self-Actualization
A motive to realize one's potentials and ability. It is as same as enlightenment. Like finding the purpose in life or the truth of the Universe.